2009 I'm Back..

Its been quite some time since my last post & Sorry to say I started smoking again. It wasn't chantix fault it was my fault I quit taking it too early - And I didn't stand by my past convictions to stop. I gave up the will to quit! I can't believe I started again it was stupid and its been quite a while that I have been smoking. I quit for about five months - I am finding out in order to quit I may have to stay away from good friends who do smoke - even though they try to be respectful and not smoke around me thats a habbit I couldn't shake lighting up to chat with friends like the good ol' days. I wish I could find the strength in myself just to quit and forget about them. I mean in five months I know there was no nictone in my body to make me crave them it was just my mental self wanting to be "that way" again. I tried to go back on chantix and not smoke but my heart wasn't into it. So now I have to build up the willpower to just do it and mean it. The next time I quit it will be with out aid because thats the only way I am going to beable to prove to myself I can do it and really mean what I am doing. I haven't set a quit date yet but soon will. This month I will have a new grandbaby arriving - I am thinking her birthdate will be a good new quit date. Wish me luck!

Thanks to everyone who read my post and offered me great support I sure appreciated it.. Sorry I have disappointed my readers..
Take care all..
With much love and appreciation
Barbara

**Coming up on 3 Months***

Feb 26th will make 3 months STOP for me.. It will also be my 40th Birthday.. YES I said it I will be 40! And OMG I can barely believe that I quit smoking before I was 40 thats freaking awesome I am proud of myself even if it has taken me over 5 years later to the date I said I would quit at.. I promised myself years ago I would quit before I was 35 well I didn't make it but at lass I finally done it!

I wont ever smoke again its creapy it stinks it makes me wonder how the hell I done it so damn long :D
Sure I think about it.. but then think why would I want to do this to myself again.. I am finally getting semi healthy and I can actually breath when its needed :P

I'm just glad my clothes house car and myself doesn't smell so shitty any more!
Any how I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!!!

I also hope........ Everyone has a Happy Valentines Day!

xoxo
Babs

Day # 43 Still a non-smoker =D

Hi everyone...
Just a quick up date!! I am still a non-smoker =-) No slip-ups no running around smelling smokers smoke.. and no longer taking Chantix.. I haven't since Christmas Eve...


No I didn't ask my doctor about going off them I just stopped taking them.. I only got 1 months supply and to be honest with everyone I have a full pack of the pills left. I'm really not worried about going back to smoking. I haven't taken but one pill a day since the second week.. yes the Chantix helped with the initial quit it was nice not to have those nicotine cravings.
But I realize it was me that wanted to quit more then the pill helping me. I have to quit --

Anyways..
Happy New Years to everyone!
xo
Babs

Day 21 - 30 on Chantix..

Hi folks! Did you think I just would never post again? lol I bet you were... Well actually I have been getting ready for xmas shopping and all that jaz! Basicly yes I have been slacking..alot.. :)

But I am still not smoking that has to be good... Lately however I have been kinda of struggling with it because I really want to smoke lol.. isn't that stupid? I just want to smoke I like it in a weird way.. blah but you know.. I really know it's just the old me that I am comfortable with I mean I have smoked since I was around 15 years old (behind my parents back when I was that young of course).

I asked a friend of mine that stopped smoking about 3 years ago.. how long it took her not to "think" like a smoker.. I think most of you know what I am talking about when I say "think like a smoker" anyways she informed me it took her about 6 months.. she quit cold turkey.. that girl has will powah! lol :)

I figure when I get past the not "thinking like a smoker" I'll have it kicked. (hopes)
This is what I think is stupid.. When I am around people who smoke it disgusts me the smell smells like it always did really.. but now its just gross.. but when I am not around the smokers I'm like UGrahgahhhh.. I want a cigarette lol.. mental huh?

Anyways.. I wanted everyone to know I'm doing fine fine.. no smokie smokie.. what am I on? my 3rd week of quit? I think so..

anyways.. take care..I'lll write again soon I promise!

PS
I found out for me its a bad idea to cut those pills in half.. blah made me have so much pain in my tummy .. :(((..

oH
Have a merry xmas if I dont make it back before to tell you so

MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY NEW YEARS! :))
(hopes 08 is way better than 07 was)

Day # 19 & 20th

Wow its been 20 days since I started the program it doesn't seem that long!!
Everything is still going F i n e I'm happy to report! I really want to get off the pills.. when is the time right to stop? I know its only been 3 weeks but I really really hate taking pills!
Can anyone let me know when they stopped taking chantix?
I read alot about 12 weeks.. but really I don't want to be on them for 12 weeks.. is this the correct amount of weeks?

Is everyone ready for the holidays? I'm a bit excited this year for christmas to come.. Such a funny feeling I haven't been excited about the holidays in years... Usually I dread the holidays.. but not this year!

Any how I'm gonna end this post~ I'll write again soon!
xox
Babs

Day #14 - 18th The Chantix Way!

Hey everyone.. its me :D I know its been a while since I have wrote! I'm still doing really good.. I went to see the doc & he said if I do not feel like taking my night pill then I don't need to take it. Of course I haven't taken it for a while any ways.. I'm doing real good I rarely think about smoking any more but I still have my moments lol* like when I have a really nice yummy meal!

I don't miss smoking this winter at all! I couldn't smoke out in the cold anyways because I would always get the huccups.. *laughs*

It doesn't bother me when people smoke around me either.. but I did notice when I was shopping in Wal-marts today when someone walked by how bad they reaked of cigarette smoke.. I can hardly believe I smelled that bad but I know I did.. I am so happy I don't any more!.. How embarasing!!

I'm so thankful to Chantix - it was so hard before to try to quit this time seems so easy..
I keep telling my syblings they need to do it..
Anyways I have gained weight I didn't think I would because I never gain weight so but
my first weigh in was 115lbs - now i am at 121lbs! my goal weight has always been 125lbs I hope I don't get any heavier than that lol!
Almost at 2 weeks stop but it feels like months .. how strange :)
18th Day on Chantix :D

xoxo
Babs

Day #12 & 13th :D~

Such a busy weekend this weekend! Friday I went shopping in a city thats approx. 45 minutes drive from the city I live in at http://www.gfs.com/ to grocery shop. I wanted bulk food lol! While in Kokomo I decided to take my mom out to eat at http://www.texasroadhouse.com/TRHintro_flash.html which I have to admit I really love the food there but this time grr my steak was so small I laughed at the waitress and asked her if she brought me the kiddy platter.. the plate was so little ni much bigger than a tea saucer. I learned my lession however I shall not ever order a 6oz steak there! By the time we got home it was around 8pm so Friday was ended I watched tv and went to bed.

Saturday from the moment I got up in the morning until it was about to go to bed I was sewing together pjs and blankets for my grandbaby for xmas. Also I learned a lession there.. just because a pattern claims to be easy.. doesn't mean it's really that easy.. Thanks to my lil sister for helping me with those PJs! Speaking of little sis who is a smoker and tries real hard not to smoke around me however I told her it was ok. Those cigarettes really stink now.. funny thing is they are my brand!

Here I sit Sunday I slept most of the day away.. I woke up at 5am stayed up until around 8am then went to take a short nap. Short my arse! I slept until 1:30PM I hate doing that it messes up my whole day.

I'm starting to think less and less of smoking.. I really don't care any more to be truthful.. Its not the most importian thing on my list like it use to be. I really don't even feel like taking Chantix any more but I wont go off it. I go to see my specialist tomorrow, I'll talk to him maybe he'll just cut me down..

Anyways that was my weekend I'll post again tomorrow!

xo

Babs